To celebrate the nuptials of our beloved Captain, Matt organised a cricket tour to the beautiful county of Devon. None of us knew what to expect but we enthusiastically signed up to a tour of the English Riviera to celebrate a friend’s wedding with the opportunity for some cricket too…. after all what the sound of willow on leather is arguably as evocative as an English Summer as Pimms and booze fuelled street brawling

Matt had kindly lined up 3 games with local teams and we were all keen to test our metal against some new opposition.

2 games
The first game was a tad un orthodox, due to a mix up the host team had booked to play against TWO teams! Perhaps news of the Clapham tardiness had made it to Devon so they booked a backup team just in case we couldn’t field a team in time. Nevertheless, Agent Benedict did a sterling job a negotiating a 3 way match up involving each team bowling eight overs with 8 bowls and over. This sounded like a fun proposition and Clapham boys took to with their usual enthusiasm….Clapham made a steady start and were making progress….then it was time for Ramps who lived up to the reputation of his name sake and swung his cobra (his bat) with a venomous ferocity not seen since in many a long year…..he scored a rapid fire 69 runs of 25 balls…including 28 of one over…. to put Clapham in strong position…..

He handed the baton over to our bowlers who were able to make short work of a mildly inebriated opposition….so Clapham started the tour with a stonking win….we drank with the opposition, one of whom confessed that they didn’t think we looked all that good when we rocked up to play…

Now this is where the story gets a bit strange….maybe it was mist rolling off Dartmoor or maybe the local brew but the first night out in Torquay ended up with the team being a man short…..our demon bowler Steve had not made it home, we only knew that he’d run off into the night. This didn’t cause any concern since Steve being from of the IoW is prone to “episodes”…..we thought he was feeling home sick and could hear the Sirens of the IoW calling across the water….

The next morning the Clapham boys gathered as is their way….which is leisurely…however there was still no news of Steve…with an opposition waiting to play we felt we had to go and hope for the best…afterall what could possibly have gone wrong, surely Steve was fine?

Game 2….what a view….such a picturesque location with a Church steeple over looking a rather lop sided pitch. This time the game was more orthodox…40 overs…

Clapham batted first….and we managed to bat the full 45 overs too…the highlights were 59 from Matt and a jug avoiding 93 from Ollie… We also had the 3 day trippers who travelled down just for the same….Triple A – Azmi, Arbab and Abdullah….all contributed to the manner and spirit in which played on that afternoon…then Triple A drove all the way back to London…what commitment!

Over to the opposition, who started solidly and kept up their run rate….Captain Macca decided to change since we still had no Steve.....rather surprisingly I was asked to step and have a bowl…and even more surprisingly, especially for me I managed to keep the ball on the pitch and on the off step most of the time…I’m not sure whether it was the slope, I heard one of the opposition batsmen tell his partner “he’s using the slope, be careful” to which I countered “I’m just trying not to bowl down the leg side or the fact that the opposition had a well stocked bar…but somehow I managed to take the last two wickets and am on a hat trick

A wedding
A wonderful ceremony full of warmth and a bit of mirth and a cloudless day in a jaw droppingly beautiful setting. We were all honoured to witness the marriage of Macca and Mon. The Polish party games were fun and got the crowd going…as well as the free bar…Cue lots of dancing and laughing…..then a sinking realisation that we’re not in Clapham and there isn’t a night bus home….this was most keenly felt by Ollie whose panicked cries still haunt Ramps…

We even had Sher Khan present who tore up the down floor late into the night alongside his erstwhile team mates…

Game 3
News travels fast in Devon….who needs the internet hey….our opposition for the 3rd game pulled out…we reckoned they’d heard all about and didn’t fancy their chances…a nickname was coined as a result…the Clapham Caesars

…a potential funeral
You’re probably wondering what happened to Steve right?....No ok, well I’ll update you anyway. After our successful second victory we caught up with a sheepish looking Steve who told us about his night…a more sorrowful tale of misfortune, bad luck and sadness you will not hear…,it was like and odyssey…however we were happy to have him back in the fold….although that haunted look he had might stay with him a while…

Once again congratulations to Mac and Mon. A wonderful and beautiful couple.

Tour Photos

The Clapham Caesars came, saw and conquered….bring on the next tour!

Raja Iqbal